I Could Have Enjoyed Breakfast In Bed

Hello to flosears at The Rabbit Warren. She has a post here that made me laugh out loud, and it reminded me of this one – OMG WWII on Facebook! - apart from being funny, it’s very cleverly done; if you read it, look at the dates and times - they correspond with the date and year events happened.

During my early morning foray into the garden the other day, I noticed the ditch, which winds its way down to the river, was getting starting to get dammed up in places with branches, twigs and rubbish.

Why can’t people dispose of their rubbish properly?

Significant Other used to keep the ditch clear, but it has now fallen to me to do it. There’s only one other task I dislike doing more than clearing the ditch, and that’s *shudder* cleaning out the hair trap in the shower.

I did consider jumping down, but the chances of me either landing face down in a load of brambles, and/or ending up on my arse in the water were extremely high.

Jumping out of a plane?

No problem.

Jumping into a ditch?

Feck off.

Once I was safely down (the wussy way), I started picking up the crap people couldn’t be arsed to throw away in a bin.

There really is no excuse for people to do this; it’s sheer laziness and utter thoughtlessness on their part.

I gradually made my way along the ditch, but because the mud is so soft, I couldn’t actually walk along in the water – I’d have ended up sinking into the mud.

I know this for a fact, as it almost happened to Significant Other a few years ago. He was standing in the water chatting away not realising, until I pointed it out, that he was sinking. Heh.

You’ll notice from the picture above the ditch is reasonably deep, but it’s important to keep it clear because after prolonged heavy rain, it can fill with water:

Apparently in the past, flooding in gardens running alongside it has occurred. So as well as litter clearing (I felt like I was one of those people serving a Community Punishment Order – all that was missing was the fluorescent jacket, oh, and a misdemeanour), I also cleared some of the vegetation:

In the process of pulling up some pretty tall weeds and launching them onto the bank, I got splattered in stinky ditch mud.

Several times.

Lovely.

Some of the rubbish I retrieved can be seen below:

People disgust me sometimes.

So that was how I spent yesterday morning – some people get breakfast in bed, some read the Sunday papers.

Me?

I cleared other peoples shit.

This morning’s task is much more enjoyable; sorting out something to wear for my hot date tonight.

Oops.

Did I type that out loud?

*wink*