I have a confession to make. Wait a minute, let me stand up for this.
*clearing throat*
My name is Bub, and I don’t like Christmas.
(I’m going to sit down now; typing when standing is uncomfortable.)
As a child I loved it, and when my children were smaller I got a lot of pleasure from their enjoyment of it. But as the years passed, I began to dislike it more and more.
The full-to-bursting shops, the queues, the enforced ‘it’s-Christmas-so-you-must-be-jolly’, the present dilemmas, present wrapping, the food shopping, the 'ooh lovely, just what I needed!' on unwrapping an umbrella (a present from my ex sister-in-law; a woman with very little imagination and brains, but good entertainment value. She once asked if the sun always rose in the same place. I kid you not. I miss her sometimes), the cooking, the crap they show on the tv – you name it, I hate it.
Bah bloody humbug.
I now try and do a lot of present buying online, but sometimes shops just can’t be avoided.
This year will be slightly different – Eldest Daughter and Captain Oz will be here - but even so, it’s not going to change my overall opinion of Christmas. In latter years, I often used to tell Significant Other that I wanted us to go away for a couple of weeks – spend Christmas on a beach somewhere. But he maintained Christmas just wouldn’t be the same if it was hot.
Maybe one day I’ll get my Christmas somewhere hot, where I can just sit back, sip a cocktail (or several) by a pool and let everyone else run around like a headless chicken (or maybe a headless turkey would be more apt).
While I’m in a confessional mood, I have another one, but I’m not going to stand up again to type because I can’t be arsed and it makes my back ache.
*ahem*
My name is Bub, and I am a bitch (I think).
It wasn't a deliberate act, but it would seem I have inadvertently pissed off (BIG time) a female family member who, for the sake of family harmony, over the years I have (mostly) refrained from biting back at when she opens her mouth. Many a time she has caused me to raise my eyebrows at things she’s said or done.
During the course of a phone conversation I had with her a couple of weeks ago, I spoke about something I thought she already knew.
She didn’t.
When I started backtracking to try and retrieve the situation, I actually made it worse.
Oops.
We haven’t spoken since.
Ah well, it’s about time she had a taste of her own medicine. Meanwhile, I’m enjoying the silence, and my eyebrows are enjoying life where they're supposed to be, instead of trying to climb into my hairline.
Muahaha.
Yep. I’m a bitch.
A Christmas hatin’ bitch.
Hi Bub,
ReplyDeleteI can see why you hate Christmas, and I cannot say I'm a fan of the shopping - or rather the shops either so I also buy a lot online. But sadly I am a fan of twinkly lights, so I end up loving it.
But the big day itself is always crap, beyond crap and a huge big disappointment.
But I do still like the lights. I must be a magpie.
Never mind about putting your foot in it, sometimes people deserve it!
Dear Bub, I do so agree with you about the unspeakable horrors which start sometime around September and are supposedly to do with the celebration of the birth of Christ - namely Christmas. However, away from all the blatant commercialism and with the company of family and friends,I really do love this time of year. And, usually, Budapest obliges with seriously heavy quantities of snow.
ReplyDeleteI do hope that you will enjoy a lovely time with your daughter and her husband this year. Try to blank out the rest!!
Christmas - hate the commercialism and insincere joviality, but love the smell of firtrees and tangerines, the glow of candlelight and the sweet sound of the Sally Army band. Long ago I stopped trying to do the "perfect" and instead began my own traditions, which made life so much sweeter. As for being a bitch, well, I think that entails being much more malicious and selfish. You'll need to try harder!
ReplyDeleteDespite the fact that I kinda love Christmas I also kinda hate that this conversation is starting and it's not even Halloween yet. I saw my first xmas commercial several weeks ago and just about lost my mind. Why can't Christmas just be a couple weeks in December and let us be on with our lives? baa humbug is right. (but I still want my wine and turkey please)
ReplyDeleteI refuse to participate in anything - shopping, decorations, jollity, smiling - until at least the 20th of December, and then I do it very grudgingly. I am now excused attendance at the work Crumblemas party as I make it obvious how much I dislike it.
ReplyDeleteI can eat enough to puke any day I want, and I don't need any more bloody socks, thank you. I drink too much anyway, so the alleged birth of some fictional character isn't going to impact on that part of my life.
However, I hate new year too. A bunch of strangers who wouldn't give each other the time of day suddenly want to kiss each other because the calender moves on a year. Balls to that.
As for bloody Halloween, don't get me started on that utter sack of shite...
Crazy Car Man's work Christmas do is this friday. The 29th October, I kid you not.
ReplyDeleteChristmas has become all about diplomacy since my folks split up four years ago - is it Mum's year or Dad's year?
Every other year we just run away and spend The Day in some obscure village in the middle of nowhere Thailand. It's blissful.
Man, these comments had me laughing...
ReplyDeleteI used to think it didn't feel like Christmas without cold and snow. When I spent my first Christmas here in NC, it was very weird. It was shirt-sleeve weather, and my roses were still blooming. Now I really appreciate it. Our one or two snowfalls in February are enough for me!
And being a bitch can be a good thing sometimes. Prevents one from being walked all over.
Liz: I will admit that once the tree is up the lights do look pretty, but I also can't wait to put it all away as soon as possible.
ReplyDeleteEdith: Given her condition, Eldest Daughter is the designated driver this year, so I will be indulging in much blanking out!
Is: I will write out a thousand times:
'To be a true bitch, I must try harder' and see if that works.
Marguerite: It's a good job I'm not Canadian or American - I'd be well and truly stuffed (heh) as I don't particularly like turkey.
IG: "I can eat enough to puke any day I want" - another bucket for monsieur... and perhaps a hose.
CGL: This Friday? Oh for goodness sake, that's ridiculous. Family politics is also another reason to dislike Christmas, so I can't say I blame you for escaping.
Kyna: Give me your address; a shirt-sleeve-weather Christmas destination is a good place to start!
oh - I like Christmas - but let's be honest. I like any holiday where it involves gift giving to ME! and lest we forget, my birthday is November 29. I'm not too proud to point it out. But I DO hate the mean people at Christmas - I feel my neck tightening up just thinking about it. grrrr...And lastly, you? a bitch? I think not. You? honest and straightforward? I think so. Oh - and really funn, too ;D
ReplyDeleteMelissa: I'm glad someone likes it!
ReplyDeleteDo you find having your birthday so close to Christmas is a bit of a pain? Youngest Daughter's birthday is a couple of days after yours and she doesn't like it. She used to moan at me and ask why I couldn't time it (her birth) better.