There are little phrases I hear that tickle me sometimes. ‘What the French Toast?!’ is one, ‘Bandang it!’ another. I now have a new one.
The other evening I asked Captain Oz if he’d like a beer. ‘Shit, yeah!’ was the response. I pounced on that one with utter glee and it’s now been added to my repertoire.
Sunday morning saw the three of us in the supermarket, stocking up on munchies. As we were perusing the shelves I saw a display of tins of chocolate and asked Eldest Daughter if she wanted to get one. As she walked over to pick one up, Captain Oz turned to me and asked me if one would be enough. ‘Shit, yeah!’ I shot back, quite loudly.
Note to self: While hearing you say ‘shit, yeah!’ with a crappy Aussie accent in the middle of a busy supermarket makes Captain Oz laugh like a drain, it does not go down too well with other shoppers, and will earn you reproving looks. You may want to tone it down a bit in future.
Eldest Daughter and Captain Oz are in New York at the moment, returning next Friday, which leaves just Youngest Daughter and I at home.
With the tin of chocolate.
Heh.
However, Youngest Daughter is, as I type, laid up in bed with the lurgy.
Which leaves me in charge of the tin of chocolate.
Oh dear.
Having gone off chocolate for the best part of two years, I rediscovered my enjoyment of it a short while ago. This doesn’t bode well for: a)my waistline, b)my arteries, or c)my car - the door pockets will overflow with wrappers.
(One year, I got super organised and bought Easter Eggs (nine) for all the kids in the family quite early and hid them away. The call of the chocolate proved too much though and I ate them all, meaning I had to go and buy another lot to replace them. Chocolate + me = pathetic lack of willpower.)
Give it a day or so and it’ll be a case of ‘what tin of chocolate?’ I can report there are already no strawberry creams left, the quantity of orange chocolate crunch is getting a bit low, as is the one with the hazelnut inside. And you can forget the green triangles - all gone.
I just hope it doesn’t come to this:
However tonight…
…I have chocolate…
…I have wine…
…and it’s the X Factor final (yes, I am the saddo that watches it).
Will I be lolling on the sofa in a happy place, overdosed on chocolate and surrounded by a sea of wrappers?
Shit, yeah!
Sounds like the perfect evening!
ReplyDeleteChocolate is the shit of the devil, so it'll go well with X Factor. I'd happily go without beer for a whole day if I had the chance to beat the living shit out of Louis Walsh.
ReplyDeleteShit, yea! the only place to be tonight, me too....
ReplyDeleteFuck, yeah... Oops, sorry... Shit, yeah!
ReplyDeleteAlthough, scratch the x-factor that is, to quote IG 'shit of the devil'.
My brother had a choclate fountain at his wedding... My word I'd never tasted anything so nice.
I'll fight you for the green triangles!
Alright. What the heck is an x factor?
ReplyDeleteahhh, I love these candies. Someone brought a tin to work the other week but the receptionist keeps hiding them when she leaves for the day so we chocolate addicts don't binge and eat the whole tray while she's away.
ReplyDeleteLiz, the X Factor is a show that is one of my guilty pleasures. It started off a few years ago as Pop Idol which, I believe, is/was called Canadian Idol where you are.
ReplyDeleteIG, what have you got against Louis Walsh? Actually, scrub that. That was a stupid question.
Libby, I didn't realise until this evening the second part's tomorrow night. Crap, need more chocolate. And wine.
Liz, Fuck, yeah - shit, yeah. Tomato, tomahto.
As for the green triangles, you'll have to wait 'til I get another tin - I've already eaten this lot!
Marguerite, I'm in two minds as to whether I'd get on with that receptionist. Part of me gets it, the other part is growling.
ReplyDeleteI don't get the chocolate thing (which I have been told makes me somewhat less of a complete woman), but sit me down with a bottle of wine and a jar of pickled onions and I will amaze you with my ability to act like a piggy!
ReplyDeleteCrazy Car Man is a demon for the dark chocolate and despises pickled onions, so bliss reigns eternal in our fridge, home and stomachs :)
Nope, don't do pickled onions - gack! And I sort of wish I still didn't like chocolate.
ReplyDeleteI lived quite happily without the chocolate craving until the Rocky Road marshmallowy/raisiny/biscuity things were introduced to me. I did manage to exercise enough willpower to stop buying it, but now it's bloody Christmas and there are tins of chocolate ALL over the shops. Sob.
ok, I am right there with you. I just spent over $200 on jelly tots and Cadbury's Roses and freaking "selection boxes" so that my US step children can have a very good english candy/sweet chocolate Christmas. Which are your favorite? I love the long skinny caramel ones......or the round toffee ones....or the solid chocolate ones....
ReplyDeleteAnd shall I have a fatter ass post Christmas this year....Shit Yeah! Merry Christmas sweetheart, have fun with the girls!
The strawberry creams never even make it home if me and my girls are anywhere within snarfing distance (snarfing is the sound we make while we lustily eat the foodstuffs which are best eaten in privacy, at least with the females in my family)
ReplyDeleteUDG, What's my favourite? Well, let's see... the purple wrapped one. Wait. The green triangle. And the strawberry cream. Wait. And the chocolate orange crunch. Hang on. The round toffee one. Um. The solid chocolate one. Hold it. The fudge one. Err. The chocolate covered toffee one. Ooh. The coconut eclair. Ye-eah and the long toffee one. Not over-keen on the caramel one though, but I will eat them. If I have to (oh, it's tough, but someone's gotta do it).
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas to you and your family too!
Nari, I know exactly how snarfing sounds - it's heard with alarming regularity here *she types with one hand while rifling through the new tin for strawberry creams*.