The reason why I very nearly spontaneously combusted last Saturday

Many people suffer from Foot In Mouth Syndrome, myself included. However, there are some circumstances where even I manage to think very carefully before I open my mouth, or in this case, put it in writing. Unfortunately not everyone has the common sense, sensitivity or empathy to do so.

Feeling a bit fragile and regretting a decision I'd made not to go to Cornwall for the anniversary of Significant Other's death, I wrote this on Facebook:

Minutes later, after reading the comment SFB (Shit For Brains) left, my jaw dropped and I responded thus:

If anyone other than a family member had left me a comment like that, I'd have willingly explained it, but SFB is married to Bro-in-law, Significant Other's brother, and really should have known better. To me, it also speaks volumes for how oblivious she is to Bro-in-law's grief; he misses his brother terribly.

She twigged what she'd done and left another two comments - the first telling me she knew where I was coming from, the second telling me she felt terrible and that I should know she was thinking of me.

While I was battling a mixture of incredulity and disgust and trying to decide how to respond, SFB then posted this on her Facebook wall:

In my opinion, and if it were me, I certainly wouldn't be drawing attention to myself over this.

A few minutes afterwards I received a text message from her, justifying why she'd written what she had:

I read it and thought, 'Oh fuck off, you stupid bitch. You can take your huge love and hugs and shove them up your arse.'

I totally dismissed her claim that she was thinking of me, because from past experience I know better. The only reason she was 'thinking of me' was because she was waiting for me to reply by saying that it was okay, thereby absolving her.

Oh, and maybe I'm being picky here, but I believe the words 'I'm sorry' are missing.

Too angry to reply, I decided to sit on it for a while. Then a bit later I saw this had appeared underneath her status:

On seeing the 'Lol' comment, the red mist descended. What, exactly, did she think was funny? By this time I knew that if I replied in the way I wanted to, all hell would break loose. I have a good relationship with Bro-in-law and I'd hate to lose that through flying off the handle at his wife (although grabbing her by the throat really appeals at times...).

Still having received no response from me, SFB then updated her status to:

Oh well, that's alright then!

Now you may be sitting in front of your screen after reading the above, thinking to yourselves that maybe I'm being a bit overly sensitive about this, and that my anger was perhaps a tad disproportionate. If what happened on Saturday was a one-off, then I'd agree with you, but apart from catching me at a particularly vulnerable time, this came as the latest in a long list of issues - far too many to write down.

But I will tell you that her top of the list, never to be forgotten offence, was an email she sent me (which I have included in a previous post, but didn't specify who it was; now I don't give a shit), titled The Hormone Guide, which started with the words:

"Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other."

She sent it to me on the afternoon of the day of Significant Other's funeral.

To say I don't like the woman would be a serious understatement.

If only!



P.S. When I'm in a better mood, I'll catch up on my blog reading.